How Play Helps Regulate the Nervous System and Heal Emotional Shutdown
Play is a universal language. It’s how we first learn about the world, how we connect with others, and how we find joy. But play is more than fun—it’s essential for our well-being. As I’ve discovered through my work with Playfight, play has a profound ability to help us heal, particularly when we feel stuck or disconnected.
When life gets overwhelming, our bodies sometimes respond by shutting down. This state, known as dorsal vagal shutdown, is a survival mechanism where we might feel numb, distant, or frozen. While this response can protect us in moments of extreme stress, staying in it too long can leave us feeling disconnected from life and the people around us.
Through the power of play, especially embodied practices like Playfight, we can gently bring ourselves out of this shutdown state and back into connection.
The Science of Play and the Nervous System
Play is one of the most natural ways to regulate the nervous system. When we play, we create an environment of safety and openness that helps the body and mind heal.
In stressful situations, our autonomic nervous system can get stuck in defensive states, either fight-or-flight or shutdown. To return to balance, the nervous system needs signals of safety—and play provides them. Here’s how:
- Movement Energizes the Body: Play involves dynamic movement, which helps break the inertia of shutdown and reconnects us to our senses.
- Social Connection Brings Safety: Many forms of play involve others. Positive social interaction activates the parts of our nervous system that support connection and calmness.
- Laughter Releases Tension: Playfulness often brings laughter, which signals to the brain that it’s safe to relax.
- Expression Releases Emotions: Through play, we can express feelings that might otherwise stay bottled up.
Studies have shown that physical play can improve emotional regulation, reduce stress, and increase vagal tone (a measure of nervous system flexibility). It’s no wonder that play feels so good—it’s our body’s way of recalibrating.
My Journey with Playfight
When I created Playfight, I didn’t fully grasp how deeply it would affect people’s lives. I designed it as a practice of playful physical interaction, where participants engage in respectful wrestling-like movements. What I’ve since realized is that Playfight isn’t just about play—it’s about healing.
I remember one participant who came into a session feeling emotionally shut down. They moved cautiously, barely engaging at first. But as the session unfolded, something shifted. They began moving more freely, laughing, and even shouting. By the end, they said they felt more alive and connected than they had in years.
This wasn’t an isolated experience. Again and again, I’ve seen Playfight help people unlock their vitality, reconnect with their emotions, and feel safe in their own skin.
Why Playfight Is an Antidote to Emotional Shutdown
Playfight amplifies the natural benefits of play by adding structure, intentionality, and connection. This combination makes it uniquely effective for nervous system regulation, especially when dealing with shutdown.
- Physical Activation: The physical nature of Playfight helps shake off the heaviness of shutdown, energizing the body and mind.
- Safe Confrontation: Playfight creates a space where participants can engage in physical confrontation without fear. This helps them face and move through emotional blocks.
- Deep Presence: In Playfight, you’re fully present with your partner. This presence fosters trust and safety, two things the nervous system craves.
- Emotional Release: The practice invites emotions to surface in a safe and controlled way, leading to profound relief and clarity.
Practical Ways to Bring More Play Into Your Life
If you’re feeling stuck or disconnected, inviting more play into your life can make a big difference. Here are some ideas to get started:
- Try a physical activity that feels fun and engaging, like dance, yoga, or Playfight.
- Spend time with friends or family doing something playful, like games or sports.
- Set aside time each week to laugh, explore, and move without a fixed goal.
Play is a simple yet powerful way to reconnect with yourself and others.
Final Thoughts
Play isn’t just for children—it’s a vital tool for adults, too. Through Playfight, I’ve seen how play can help people move out of shutdown, heal emotional wounds, and rediscover their connection to life.
If you’re feeling numb or disconnected, consider making space for play in your life. Whether it’s through Playfight or another form of playful interaction, it can open the door to healing, connection, and joy.
Matteo Tangi